Me. Myself & i

i'm totally crushed.
i neva tot i could actually love someone so dearly..
and i neva tot ending it can hurt so much.
not tryin to be mushy here.

lying on my bed, i felt like a carcass, waiting for vultures to devour me.
i really understand now, wat it means when ur heart aches.
wat it means to love till it hurts.

wo bu shi yi ge qing yan ai de ren.
i dun say love easily.

i hurt him.
i hurt someone that i love so muchz.
i cant believe how stupid i am.
how insensitive i can get.

i fell.. uncontrollably...
and i smashed into pieces..

no words can express how bad i feel for hurting him.
i should not have lied..
i'm willing to do a million and one things jus for him to forgive me..
i neva tot i can go so low...

yup..
i neva knew this side of me...

it hurts most when i noe i'm de one who broke his heart.
it hurts when u noe he is hurting, and u can do nothing about it.
it hurts when u think of the things we planned to do together...
it really hurts when he told me... we're still good frens...
it really hurts when things were jus so beautiful during the short time we're together...
it really hurts ... very badly...

there's a thousand and one love songs that i can really relate to now..
that i neva tot i will be so weak, so cliche..
i always tot pple feel down becos they choose to...
they're so polluted by drama serials that they think they have to cry, to stay up de whole nite, to listen to sappy love songs.. when they break up...
i was so wrong.
it'll neva hurt when u're not de one experiencing it...

i may sound silly now. to myself when i read this some other time..

je m'ennuie de lui chèrement, je t'aime beaucoup.
si seulement il peut me pardonner
si seulement nous pouvons commencer encore une fois
je le priserai
je l'aimerai avec tout mon coeur
je volonté jamais, le blesse jamais toujours encore
ceci que je jure