Been a long time since i posted something, tot i'll do it today since i'm a little tipsy.. Just went to a friend's birthday party at MOS.. Kind of gave me some idea of what to write for my blog, rather, i felt something strong enough to be written about..

For the longest time i have been telling people, if ur 'so called friends' can't be bothered with you, then to hell with them. I try to put that into practise myself. But somehow or rather, when people grow older and nearer to the age of 21, they tend to get more naive (though sci still haven figure out how) and they start to open themselves to all kinds of nonsense that they normally wont.
For example, your's truly here, decided to book a chalet for not one, not two but three nights to celebrate her birthday. (the third night is really an innocent mistake)
Hoping that her close friends will stay over for the first night and her juniors can have the chalet for the second, she went ahead happily with the booking. Thinking that all will work out well and fine.
At long last, murphy's law forbids that things should go as they do in ur head. Her 'close friends' started telling her that either they won't be staying or they cannot confirm staying. At this juncture, i should thank the two girls who immediately replied me and told me they'll stay. Because i should conc on who's coming, instead of who's not. Since they cannot 'take the trouble' to stay over, den perhaps they don't deserve the space. (except some who are working full time, like KW who has to fly almost every day...)

Niang niang who gungho-ly told me she'll stay for all the days available. hahahah and dying to play mahjong. Girl, i hope you're glad to know not many people will be competing with you for the table...

Shannon who told me she'll be able to stay on the 27th once i msg her.. Thank you girl, though you seldom can stay out, i appreciate this very much.

For someone who can spend her birthday abroad with no supposed close friends around, i can hardly think of an excuse for myself to be so stupid this time.
I have half the mind cancelling the whole thing. Look, when even your boyfriend ask you is it alright not to go, you've got to start questioning really, "is there something wrong with me?"

21st birthday - is it really important?
Yeap, there's only one 21st, but there's also only one 22nd, 23rd, 24th.... So wat's so special about 21st?

21st is special for me. N only i will know the significance. It means i have stepped into another phrase in my life, i can make decisions legally for myself.
It means i can get married without my parents' approval, go do something that might risk killing myself without a consent form, and work in a lawfirm as an intern without asking my parents to indemnify me.
I am responsible for myself.
I shout out to the whole world, that i can make decisions for myself.

When you are 18, ur decisions are not good enough... Your choice is being queried. You are being lead on.
What if i'm 21 and i still make the same choice?

"Remember, remember...the fifth of November, the Gunpowder treason and plot. I know of no reason why the Gunpowder treason ever should be forgot."

Sigh..

Since this is the year that most of my friends turn 21, i got all excited after attending two parties, and decided to start planning my own. Thinking i'll have the kind of treatment that my two elder sisters had, my maternal aunts and uncles gave them Ang baos and celebrated their birthday..
My third aunt, one who has the most say around the house, just told me that if i don't do well this sem, i can forget about celebrating my birthday.
I'm not too sure how to take this.. (not my gemini nature acting up..) I guess on one hand you can say that she has so much confidence in my brains, that even i don't have. Thinking that with some incentive, maybe i'll perform to the fullest potential.
On the other, i just feel.. helpless. I really really don't think i'll be able to do well. It's as if someone is telling me, unless the world is flat, we will celebrate your birthday. But i'm sure she's got my interests at heart. However, using my results as a condition is more depressing than anything.
How can i explain to her, that it is not within my control? (Insert the whining about bad results here)

I can feel myself giving up the struggle. From a law school hopeful to someone who is just trying to stay afloat. I know becoming negative wont help, but i guess i cannot face anymore disappointment. At some point, you let urself down so badly, that you start joking about it. It doesn't necessary mean you have accepted the fact, just means you have given up. Why fight it when the jokes will come anyway.

I still rem how i told paul last sem, that i want to prove to others that i can fight for the good grades... Now, i'm not even participating in class.

It is easy to back out. I told myself, if they don't want to celebrate my 21st, den i'll just have a simple affair. I guess if the verdict is such, i don't even want to celebrate if i miraculously do reasonably do well. Perhaps it's too extreme to say that my happiness is judged by my results, but that's the way i feel..

At the end of the day, i still want to believe if you really put your mind to it, you will be able to do it...

Cheers,
WR

Sore loser Jose Moaninho has voiced his support for Benfica in their CL game against Liverpool tonight.

The true potugeese told the press that he has always been a Benfica fan even though he was with Barcelona before joining Chelsea. He never said this before until his team got kicked out of Champions League. Why? If his english team cannot get through, he doesn't want other english teams to get into the final 8, what sore, spoilt brat, loser.
Without anything to complain about the referee who awarded chelski their last minute penalty, in case this big head team lose too badly and risk getting death threats, our 'special one' decided to continue harping on the first leg. "We haven't seen 11 v 11"... Whole load of BS. If your pitch was in a better condition, even with 12 people, i'm pretty sure Ronaldinho will still kick your sorry A**.

Kaos.. Lose den lose laH! Don't give excuses k!

It's a good day...
Will continue to be one when liverpool wins :D

Waiting for 4 am.... meanwhile, i shall pass my time by doing my tutorial...

Regards,
WR

This is hilarious - Man U fans, no offense..

Cheers

It is official, my allergy to Lux-shower cream. (No, not my dropping out of law school, at least not yet...) As soon as i applied it, my left hand started itching. I wonder why medication doesn't act as half as fast?
Anyway, i saw a movie today! Big news, because i haven seen a movie since ... when? i can't rem. Starring Jennifer Aniston and Kevin Cosner - Rumour has it. I particularly like the following conversation.

"I know this isn't the kind of things parents tell their children, but the day your mother came back, we conceived you."
"But you know, dad, i'm so different. I never liked tennis, i drive like a mad person and you drive so slowly!"
"I drive slowly only because you are in the car."
erm, i think at this time i have to explain, Nope, Kevin Cosner did not act as Jennifer's dad... But that's not the point of the conversation...
The conversation, filled with so much love, unconditioned love from a parent to a child. This love, it is without any strings attached, from deep within. So much of it that he has changed his character, his style, because he is afraid that something bad might chance upon his precious girl. This, is the love of a parent, this, is pure love.
Nothing in the world can compare to this, absolutely nothing. It doesn't matter if your parents are chinese, american, english, malay, educated, less educated - they love you the best way they know how...
As bad as you get it outside, you come home and bask in the warmth of their love.

I did something wrong today. I couldn't understand my readings and fell asleep, only waking up when my parents came home in the afternoon. Really bothered by the lack of time and patience, i lost my temper with my mom when she asked me if i was alright. She walked out without a frown and i know she was sad, but she completely understands me. She din flew into a rage and complain why are we always venting our frustration at her. She doesn't come home in the middle of the night and start throwing things around, justifying it by saying 'you guys do it too, why cant i?'. She'll never think about how much we love her but always and will never stop loving us... she always talks about the possibility of leaving once we are independent...

I always wonder why some people value their romantic love more than the love of their parents... Are they even comparable? I don't think i'll ever find a man who can love me like she does, other than my dad, of cos...

With Love,
WR

"The greatest victory to evil, is for the good to do nothing."
This was what my friend told me yesterday, not sure if i got it right but still, very meaningful. My letter to the forum wasn't published, perhaps too minute an issue for the national papers. Kind of disappointed, still i hope i can do something more to help those students. But not being related to the incident anyhow, just makes me a nosey person.
I just wish the parents can stand up for their children, not for the academic achievement but a right that this kids ought to have. To stop being oppressed by the unreasonable demands of the school. Passive parents can only result in passive children. So who do we blame for the indifference in our society?
Disillusioned as i may be, i still think the next generation can be educated correctly. I believe that if we all do our part in educating them, they won't turn out to be like most of us, often wondering if we're just a small pawn in the great economy of Singapore.
I do what i can with my tuition kids. Perhaps they may not be the scholars of their batch, but i'd like to think that at least i'm a positive influence in their lives, teaching them about choices, etc.
Sigh. Bleak...

Regards,
WR


Thank you for writing to us. We do appreciate your making the effort.

We receive 70 letters on average each day. Limited space means we can publish only about a dozen every weekday.
This means having to make often-difficult editorial judgments on which letters to publish.

We regret we are unable to publish your letter this time, and hope you will appreciate the constraints on space we face every day.
We hope you will continue taking an interest in the Forum Page.


Yours sincerely


Ms Noor Aiza
for Forum Editor
The Straits Times

i guess i will spend my morning writing a letter to the forum for my aunt's student.
hMmmm

I'll write my draft here.. actually, since it doesn't concern me, i have no idea how to write LOL. But it is about education, so i shall try...

MOE Policy regarding student's choice of subject
I am writing regarding the policy of one particular boys' school in Bishan which requires students, who had done relatively well for normal chinese, to drop their higher chinese and concentrate on getting distinction for the former subject. I would like to know if the MOE allows for such imposition.
The student in question had obtained a B3 for his O' Level Mother Tongue, hence his parents and him believe that he will do relatively well for his Higher Chinese. This is important for his aggregate scores because he will be allowed to deduct two points so long as he passes his Higher Mother Tongue.
However, it has been told to them that those who did not achieve a distinction for their Mother Tongue must drop their places in Higher Mother Tongue. This, in fact, has robbed the students their choices and possibly a fighting chance to their dream schools.
I can understand that the school wishes the students to do well in the basic subject before taking on a seemingly more advance course. However, as a student myself, i believe that these students should be given a choice, instead of imposing it on them. Moreover, this student and i'm sure many others are well capable of securing the 2 points deduction, which can make a difference to their scores.

By imposing such policy on students, it is questionable the direction the school is taking. It seems that the school has ignored the individual element, instead, only interested in achieving a seemless track record for itself. Aren't schools suppose to be nurturing thinking students who can make choices for themselves? In order to train responsible citizens we ought to allow students to make their own choices.

I sincerely hope MOE will look into this matter as soon as possible to give these students a justified answer.