Hehheh heh...
wonder if anyone read this anymore
LOL
but i'm goin to write anyhow.
hahaha

yup yupZzz
been lazing ard alot.
*looks ard*
dun really noe what am i busy with actually.
jus running here and there everyday...
and the bad news is i'm falling sick again!!!
sigh..
let's hope all de herbal tea i've been drinking works.

anyway>>
i think all my scholarship forms are in de rubbish bins now..
sigh..
gonna take loan from bank.
HATe the feeling of being in debt.
ARGH
anyway>> even if i make it to the interview, i might not make it after it.
sigh sigh sigh..
talk about no confidence in oneself.
rah...

hmmm
i think i really dunnoe what i wan to study..
my application forms for the 3 universities reflect totally different courses..
must be crasy.
which reminds me i have to pay the application fee real soon.
ARGH

oh yah. not forgetting kenna fly aeroplane by them yesterday..
initially goin to smu to pay de fees and hand up the documents.
those iderts flew me aeroplane, as usual. not like i haben done it to them. but i realised that mayb goin alone will be much much easier...
becos lately i realised that guys like to be late.
much later than me.
so i'm starting to wonder if they are putting on make up like why other gers are late.
hemmmm no offence bros!
hahahah

lalalalala...
i'm hungry
very hungry...
but noting to eat.
mayb can make a trip to macs
hahaha
miss mac breakfast.
BUT DAMN Ex..
sigh...
everything is money
step out the house only... money...
even at home u switch on the fan also cost money...
haiiiiiiiiii

oh yah.. miss bintan!
went bintan for 3 days.
hhahahaha k k call me swaku
but i neva seen such a nice beach in my life
really really blue and got waves! hahahahahha
can play body board. yeah yeah.. fun very fun
but very ex also
LOL
hahahaha

all de crap that i've been goin thru man..
anyway>> i'm single again! LOL.. wonder am i available
hahahahha
but i think i'm abit to happy to be single.
lalalalla
nah.. relationships not for me.
jus read a chn book about a few unmarried lady talking about love.
hemmm
haven really given up hope on love yet . but also not hoping much hahaha
lalalalla
life goes on~~~~
GRINZ

heh heh..
today is an important day of mylife....

not that i support using results to define one's success
but it's inevitable in singapore.

and i have proved myself worthy, to myself and all those who have looked down on me before.
more importantly, i'm glad that i have not let those who love me down, those frens who were with me thru the most difficult times.

thank you farmers, for the joy u all have brought me during our times studying together.
all de crap that we talk about...
without them, esp boss who went for econs with me as early as 8 to listen to mdm lee doin mcqs... set and bear to go back sch to study, most of de time end up talking... and de times we went over to set's house and wished our a's were over so we could really enjoy...

i missed those times.

i'm glad i've cleared this major hurdle in life....

one thing i've learnt... it's never the intelligence.. .. no matter how clever you are, you need hardwork and perserverance... i nearly gave way.. if i had not fell hard for my o's, i wouldn't be where i am today. i din want to fall again becos de pain, disappointment for me and my family was too great for me to take again...

anyhow... now that everything's settle... i can start drawing plans for future...

i'll always rem my life in yj.
the good times. the bad ones..
i've really learnt alot in yj.
thou i have been complaining about there ever since i got in, it had a major impact in my life.
thank you yj.

cheers

oh yeah...
i'm concern about something else as well...

was packing the papers in de tuition centre yesterday when a couple came, paying for tuition fees for their children.
boss: we're starting an enrichment course for children, teaching them things outside syllabus. you interested ?
mother: of co (somehow she misses her s-es and mispronouce her english words) do you have age limit?
boss: no lah. parents will decide when they want their child to start.
mother: oh that good. other places dun allow me to enrol my children. they say too young.
lady-boss: that's the thing they dun understand, it's never too young to start.
mother: yeah. they should start in kindergarden. i want to prepare them for the GEP examination in pri3.

....
my blood was boiling as i listened to their conversation.
my heart really goes out to those children who have their mondays to sundays packed, taking tuition for all their subjects, enrichment, piano, dancing drawing. believe me when i say the movies weren't exaggerating...

my boss was saying he has a class to teach pri 4 kids do algebra...
so i assume 2 years later pri 6 kids will be learning differentiation?
all for the sake of our GEP, accelerated programs, NUS school of Sci and Maths. for the prestige? to them it's to ensure a better future for their children.
but think again. a child who finished 20 years of studies in 15 or even 10 years, wat nez? will he be developed enough in other areas to ensure survival? or is his skills onli applicable to studying? did he have the time to learn how to socialise? to learn how to mingle around? to learn how to work with other people?
so what if your child noes how to do differentiation when he is 12 years old? if they're happy and passionate about learning all that is taught, i have no position to comment. but are they? or are they forced?

since tuition centres are offering such enrichment programs, and my tutor even told me this "if you teach slower than the sch, then you want tuition for wat?" which totally don't make sense to me.
TUITION, in the pass, is to help the weaker students understand what he is unable to grasp in school. IT was a complement to school.
TODAY, tuition is teaching all that the school teaches at a faster rate, and MORE than require. so today, schools are complements to tuition instead. our children go to school to socialise, to compare who has more tutors, how much are they paying and that they have already finish the syllabus in june.
So why send your children to school if you plan to give them all sorts of enrichment program . i believe those who can afford 400 a month for each subject can jolly well jus let their children take the exam without goin to school.
without goin to school, their children will have more time to schedule more lessons. now they can learn organ and piano, thou both makes no difference to me.
or are they treating the school as a child care centre, as they go work and earn more money to pay for the high tuition fees...
no wonder almost anyone with a degree and apply to be a teacher, cos nowadays, school teachers dun have to noe how to teach. parents will find tutors for their children, whether or not they need them.

no wonder everyone is becoming a tutor. it's a sunrise industry. and doubt it's setting for the next 10 years. the demand will always be great.

so i'll be looking forward to de day when a pri 6 kid can teach me how to do complicated trigo question and a sec 4 kid programming an operation system...

i jus heard someone questioned " with all the a's our jc students are getting, shouldn't we be having many einsteins and newtons in singapore?" i'm curious as well...

it's BEEN A LONG LONG LONG WHILE SINCE I UPDATED MY BLOG!!!!!
anyway it's been a while since i came online...
din really have time to come
cos de tuition centre i'm working for is opening another branch.
and the amount of papers i have to fotocopy for the new branch is.... DISGUSTINg...
it's till the point u get disgusted when u touch ppr when u get off work.
go figure.

yupz
and took up 2 tuition. both twice a week..
one pri 4 and another secondary 4.
rather taxing lately as the pri 4 ger is having her CA this week and the Sec 4 ger has tests every week.

that explains why i'm always unreachable.
and unable to come online to clear my mail and update my blog.

frankly, other than not being able to spend time with my frenz, my ever dearest farmer frenz and a couple of close frenz, i'm quite happy with my life. cos being busy makes me feel important.
more importantingly , giving tuition makes me feel that i'm helping someone else. hopefully i'm of help thou. tt's besides the point.
yupz, i enjoy being buzy. packing my day with events, it's definitely betta than lazing around at home looking at my toe nails grow.
=)

anyhow, the excitement of the news of releasing of results is wearing off. or perhaps my days are too packed to think about it. or maybe it's de assurance of the people around me. that i'm definitely goin into university, jus whether it's a good course or a bad one. seriously, i think i dun have anything to fred about, becos firstly, i dun have to worry if i'll be able to get a scholarship. as we all noe that that's somewhere near impossible. secondly, as bad as a CCC can get me into u. so frankly, everyone will tell me not to worry.
so i shld jus shut up and get on with life.
yupz, cos perhaps i'm in no position to get too happy or too sad.

life goes on.

yup yupz...

oh yeah...
just yesterday they annouce that one will only hafto take chinese exam in order to enrol into university. whether or not he passes is no longer in consideration, thou if one passes, he'll have points added to his raw score.
i really question this move that the moe is taking.
by doin this they'll onli re-enforce the idea that chinese is useless among the younger generation.
a student from hc was quoted saying the ministry should have annouce it earlier so that students could spend the time they used on chinese on other subjects.
what kind of mentality is that? i'm disgusted, even more becos she is from hc, which is suppose to emphasize on our values and roots.
you are a CHINESE and you think spending time studying the language is better off used on other subjects.
this clearly shows how distorted their thinking is already. they'd rather spend time on more pragmatic subjects.
sooner or later, we'll be telling our chinese fables in english.
and chang er will most probably get a christian name as the new generation will find it a hassle to try to pronouce her name. MARY CHANG?
apart from the economics value of mandarin, which i dun see at all when all china chinese are trying to hard to learn english. and many cases have proven that they believe that the grass is greener in the other side of the world. so much so that an oxford year 4 engineer student was able to bluff his way thru in beijing university as a lecturer for their masters students in economics. he finished 15 out of 16 chapters in a day, and he was scheduled to lecture for 3 days str8. no one questioned why he went so fast.
anyway, i digressed.
apart from the economics value of chinese, as chinese, i believe we should at the very least noe how to read, write and speak proper mandarin. personally, i'm disgusted by myself when i have to use english in between my sentences. i look down on myself, feeling like a half-breed, not here nor there. no offence. but thats how i see myself.
i was appalled when a student said that she was escalated at the news that chinese will not be taken into account for university enrolment.
and the thing is that i've never seen a malay speak to another malay in english and an indian to another in english. the pathetic singaporean chinese are the onli ones in the world, that needs the government to think of ways and means to MAKE them learn their mother tongue.
pardon me but i really think it's utterly PATHETIC.

i wonder ten years down the road, will Lianhezaobao be still around? by then, maybe liu bei and co. will also have a christian name...

hiak hiak..
i'm goin off soon!!!!
yupZzz
ermm
having fun
slacking
really bad for me..
but not for long
cos results coming out soon!!!
argh
i cant believe i onli got 1200 for my sat..
i'm angry with myself now
ARGHHHHH!!!!
to think dat i studied for it..

but wat is done cannot be undone..

yupz
so right now i jus hope i do well for a's.

sigh hope and pray..

anyhow>> my ex apologize for wat happen last time
haha
interesting
yupz
so.. i'm suppose to accept his apology
and i did.
wat is there to be sorry about anyway?
hrmmm

yup yupz
i'm goin off pretty soon

organizing a class gathering on 14th feb
let's hope most of de pple turn up!!!
*grinz*
hope it'll be fun!!!
hiakz hiakz

yup goin off now..
cheers

hrmm
dramatic turn ard for me.
~~`
no comments.

rather confused bout my life rite now.
dunno wat de heck i wanna do with it
i suddenly really miss those studying days.
at least i had stuff to do
and noe wat i'm suppose to complete everyday..
argh

completely no direction in life
and fretting over de day i'll be collecting my results.
ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!

heard it'll be out de end of this month
pui

walk ard bugis today
really interesting place at nite..
think i'll explore summore tml..

anyway might go ask for a job in de restaurant tml..
*grinz*

k lah i dun have much to talk about
jus realised i'm a bitch
yup.
bloody bitch.
hate myself.
=p

take care

i'm totally crushed.
i neva tot i could actually love someone so dearly..
and i neva tot ending it can hurt so much.
not tryin to be mushy here.

lying on my bed, i felt like a carcass, waiting for vultures to devour me.
i really understand now, wat it means when ur heart aches.
wat it means to love till it hurts.

wo bu shi yi ge qing yan ai de ren.
i dun say love easily.

i hurt him.
i hurt someone that i love so muchz.
i cant believe how stupid i am.
how insensitive i can get.

i fell.. uncontrollably...
and i smashed into pieces..

no words can express how bad i feel for hurting him.
i should not have lied..
i'm willing to do a million and one things jus for him to forgive me..
i neva tot i can go so low...

yup..
i neva knew this side of me...

it hurts most when i noe i'm de one who broke his heart.
it hurts when u noe he is hurting, and u can do nothing about it.
it hurts when u think of the things we planned to do together...
it really hurts when he told me... we're still good frens...
it really hurts when things were jus so beautiful during the short time we're together...
it really hurts ... very badly...

there's a thousand and one love songs that i can really relate to now..
that i neva tot i will be so weak, so cliche..
i always tot pple feel down becos they choose to...
they're so polluted by drama serials that they think they have to cry, to stay up de whole nite, to listen to sappy love songs.. when they break up...
i was so wrong.
it'll neva hurt when u're not de one experiencing it...

i may sound silly now. to myself when i read this some other time..

je m'ennuie de lui chèrement, je t'aime beaucoup.
si seulement il peut me pardonner
si seulement nous pouvons commencer encore une fois
je le priserai
je l'aimerai avec tout mon coeur
je volonté jamais, le blesse jamais toujours encore
ceci que je jure

sigh..
i'm rather down now..
bleai
cos i had a really great afternoon with him...
but sorta messed it up when i got home..
now i'm really really down.
argh...
jus wish i can noe what is goin on in his head now.

let's jus hope he is sleeping ...
or talking to his mum..

sigh.
think it's someting tt i msg that pissed him off..
argh
but i dun mean anything in a sacarstic way yeah?

hrm..
let's hope that i'm jus over reacting.


yupZzz
thinking of quiting my pathetic job..
thinking of doin something really interesting..
but yet to noe wat.
sigh
my life is act. qt a mess as well huh?
why cant i jus stay put in that job?
*wonders wonders*
perhaps the grass always looks greener on the other side.

yupz
he's trying to call..
wah...
let's hope nothing's wrong
hiak hiakz

cheers

ahhh
i'm sorry!!!!
for not updating for de past week
rather buzy...
hahahaha
and alot of stuff i cant publish
so no point anyhow...
yupZ

sick again after my new year break
totally pissed off with my tuition centre
i wanna start biz myself now.
and i mean now!
yupZzz
and rather happy new year btw.
i miss my frens!
hhahahaha
gotta meet up with them reallllll soooN!
hiak hiakzzz

k k
i got to go rest now.!!!
take care!!!!

i've got a mindful of stuff now.

firstly, i cant make it on sunday to help dem.
cos i gotta go help my mom.
and i can onli leave at 1.
de thing is, my sister is buzy with her honors report.
and she's sorta under pressure from her prof.
so.. i hafta make it.

secondly, i cannot dun go. cos i haven been doing anything.
i cannot get ven.
and i think even if i can, i cant do much.
anyhow> i think they jus wan my presence felt.

thirdly, i haben been getting enough sleep.
and i jus came home and had my dinner at 2230...
and everyone comes and bombard me with qns and more qns, tt i cannot ans.
argh.

forthly, i'm worried sick about my sat.
i've yet to get my result.
and i've yet to completely memorising all de vocabs which i'm very sure i'll not be using them anytime soon.

fifthly, i'm really sick. yeah still sick.
de cough is like showin no signs of goin off.
and it gets worst at nite or in de morning....
it's irritating de hell out of me.

and i'm typing with my eyes closed.
i nid to go sleep.

waking up tml to jog and study.

tml will be a betta day.

hrmm...
started joggin today~
hahahaha
feels good.
it feels really good to be able to run and jump about again!!!
except tt at nite i still cough like hell..
wonder wat kind of cough is tis.
i onli cough at nite when i'm home...
argh

anyhow~~
hahaha
decided i'm actually getting alot for doin so little...
i can scan stuff and play computer games without worries.
cos they end up teaching me how to play de game...
and i was reading magazine today as well..
latest issue of YOU magazine, courtesy of mr yan~
hahahahaha
so act. i'm enjoying life. air con summore....
=p

oh yeah..
suppose to call tuition agency tml and tell 'em i'm free to tuition anytime of de day le...
cos i realised as long i sign in and sign out de rite timing, no one cares wat time i go there, wat time i leave..
hahaha
talk about flexible...

=p

good mood todayz

shall go off le~
waiting for boss to tell me all about his first day...
so where's he now?

hrmmm

hrmmm
well well
for those of u who are interested
my life is goin fine...
not much ups and downs lately
like wat pple say, ping fan shi fu..

yeapz.
begining to think i talk alot.
hahahaha
and no action.
i feel bad lah...
was into some things with the clique.
and i think i'm de onli one not doin anything.
am i really that busy?
i dunno.
somehow de time jus couldn't match with theirs.
i seems to be into alot of things that, in actual fact, are not impt.
k, whether impt or not, it's to individual standards.
sigh.
i can always say i haf alot of things to attend to.
gotta take up some fianancial burden at home.
gotta go ard finding a betta paying job in order to do that.
i hafta hope and pray that i get some tuition job to add on to my meagre pay.
but seriously, i think all of us are facing diff kinds of pressure in life. i may think they're leading a good life, free from worries.
but i jolly well noe that everyone has their own probs... so i'm beginning to think that, perhaps all those are jus excuses. to excuse myself from the responsibility. to excuse myself from making the effort to even be there...

but sometimes, it jus seems dat something is holding me back.

anyway>> i shall try to do wat i can... thou not much. hahaha i always feel useless ard em...but be it buying drinks, or running errands, at least i'm doin something....

anyhow, for my present job, thou i haf flexible hours and i can take leave as and when i like. de environment is fine.
but the pay is really little.
well, we win some, we lose some.
but i cannot take it when i haf to do scanning or photocopying of stuff..
k, so far its onli the third day of work.
we shld gif it some more time....
so i shan't comment tt much.

anyhow>> i'm seriously thinking of switching jobs.
something more interactive.
it's really not me to sit there from dunno when to dunno when.
i'd rather be serving pple in some restaurant.
and the pay is betta loh... $7/hr i get to talk to pple somemore.
i jus hope de venue is somewhere near home..
the travelling fare is really killing me.

hrmmm
looking at job agency online....
argh
i've concluded tt not one day can pass without money.
everything and anything has it's price.
so nez time when u say "money doesnt make the world go round" think again.

i hate it when i haf to worry bout $$...
i hate it when someone dear to me needs it and i can do nuthing about it...

damn

hey heyz
took leave today..
cos was drowsy after taking my medicine
still abit lite headed now...

hahah
sorrie din update these few days...
dunnoe wat to write actually...

but my life is great now.
hahaha
i think nothing could be betta...
all seems too good to be true for me.
but i'll jus hafta take a step at a time yeah?
no point worrying myself sick...

hahaha i AM sick..
hrmmm....

anyhow>> finally caught LOTR yesterday~
hahaha
wasn't really wat i expected.
i tot should be betta...
hahaha
maybe it was de medicine yeah?
i was more into de story den de effect yesterday...
perhaps i should catch it de second time.
=)

anyhow>> got tis doin phy qn job. and trying very hard to do all de qn... hahaha gotta hand up tis week end eh..
die die die.
some of em i cannot do !!!
=p
kenna threatened that if i dun do well for my phy i dun hafta see mr goh le.
idert~

yeah yeah...

"hardwork will not get u to the top, but it'll get u very near to the top"

"ideas will always remain as ideas when not acted upon"

hahah
these are things that everyone noes.
but jus how many can do it?
how many can do it well?
and hold on to em?

i hafta start today.

cheers

wr

hrmm
cant stop coughing eh..
mus be de 7up i drank during de wedding dinner...

de wedding dinner suxz
hahahaha
filled with uncles and aunties tt i've neva see b4 in my life.
no idea how to call em as well..
so jus hello uncle hello auntie all de way.
and we were too early.
i nearly grew roots at de table
and my cheeks hurt from smiling at de pple who came to talk to my grandpa.
cant singaporeans be abit more courteous? and be punctual?
wateva happen to de courtesy campaigne.
wasted all de money for nothing.
shld jus gif it out as ers as well...

hrmm
eat snake during work today
wahahha
cos i fin sorting my stuff rather early
den jus walk around talking to the teachers while they sort their stuff...
damn entertaining
a teacher was a nus biz stud b4
so asked her about biz fac.
apparently there's alot of project..
and she's from logistic.
so not my interest...
but got to noe more about choosing wat to study in u.
hahaha
shall worry bout tt later...
=p

hrmm
nuthin much happened today...

haha i told myself
i mus learn not to say "i wasn't told to do this... i wasn't informed of that..." or stuff lydat
cos i shld be more active.
to ask instead of waiting to be told.
i think everyone noe this but it's really qt tough to practise it.
bleai..
i shall try my best
hahahah
cos i'm still qt lazy.
=p

anyway. gotta go sleep le!
hiak hiakzz
tml gotta go help my mum.

nite nite

heh heh heh...
i'm in a good good mood today...
anyhow i hope things will remain as it is today.
i'll be de luckiest ger in de whole wide world.
=)

working from 12 to 5 tml...
tt's 5 hrs. so it's 25 bucks tml.
haiz.
i think i'm getting too lil.
but considering my working environment.
so frenly and free and easy. i really shouldn't complain anymore
i act. walk bare footed ard and ate tidbits in de centre
hahahah k k.. no students today. so nvm.
hahaha
den had de feeling i was swimming in pprs.
cos there was alot of sorting of pprs in a tuition centre.
i think my degree went up a whole lot jus cos of searching for de year and sch.

yeahh
and got free dinner
courtesy of a family fren
really nice food and i suppose the ambience if dere wasn't so many pple making noise in de little place.
would like to go there again. when i haf de means.
hahaha
yeahhhhh

k.
as all of u can see.
i'm on cloud no. 9.
i wonder wat will happen tml.
i think i'll fall back to 8th level of hell..
choy choy choy..
hopefully not.
=p

hahaha
finally understand wat's counting de hours while working
but today still not tt bad.
everytime i checked, half an hour would haf passed.
so rather fast.
i hope nez time it'll be one hour.
cos i heard i've got alot to do.
wah.. and i'm onli paid 5 bucks an hour.
they really noe how to save man.
damn...

not goin to d'l de software today.
cos i think i goin off soon
and not goin to see my tutor online.
=p

more sorting tml.
so i'll be busy.
hopefully
cos i wont be entertained.
till nite..........
anyway i'll be at a wedding dinner
hahaha
cos my cute ah gong wanna go.
=)

anyhow>>
i think i'm against goin into relationship now
hahahaha
not tt i'm turning into a fossil
but yah..dating is fine.
but bgr is too serious le...
cos i think :
de ger will suddenly wan more from de guy
time to accompany her, his attention, his care . yada yada yada
and de guy will start to want to convert his attention to something else. hahaha no i'm not slaming guys or wat. but i jus feel so ba...
sigh.
if onli everything can stay lydat.
but i noe things wont last.
cos de ger will start to ask for more. and de guy will start to move back.
or vice versa.

hahaha.
matters of de heart i can neva understand.

take care.
good nite
sweet sweet dreams.
*hugz*

HapPy NEw YEaR!!!
hahaha
k k
boliao

hrmmm
din really enjoy myself at zouk yesterday...
i seriously dislike crowds.
esp if i haf to move ard in it.
and de pple dancing... i wonder if they're dancing or jus jumping or jus rubbing themselves against others, males and females alike...
some pple can jus drink themselves silly and fall everywhere on de dance floor...
they look old eh...
but they dun act their age.
i mean thou u're suppose to relax and enjoy urself, but come'on lah, at least not to de extend of making a fool of urself yeah?
how to enjoy if u drink urself silly?
there's tis group of pple who formed a circle and they were obviously very drunk. cos they kept falling onto other pple.. jumping up and down... wah.. dunno wat de hell lah...
wonder wat happen aft de party's over..
they get throw out of de club? or they jus lie on de streets?
i'm curious..
hahahaha

i tink i was looking at pple more than clubbing.
see how pple dance, see how a fight nearly broke out on de dance floor, being aware of de pple ard me..
hahaha
to de extend some1 told me i'm too self conscious...
den wat? like de ger in his arms ah?
she got drunk and was practically hanging on him lah.
so i still believe strongly tt i shld get a group of really close frens to club with.
hahahah

yeap.
i left abt 2, reached home bout 2 plus. but talked to my fren till 4.
told him everything tt was troubling me.
hahaha
k k.. i think there's no trouble at all.
i jus found stuff to trouble myself wif...
no choice lah... too free lately ..
so mus find stuff to keep my mind occupied.
thou not very healthy stuff but, still can prevent rusting
whahaha

anyhow>>
i din haf a good day today.
i also noe we shldn't meet up everyday...
but yah.. noeing and doin is two diff thing ba..
at de very least i was hoping i get some reply
yet, there wasn't any.
hahah
shall cont tis in another blog.
=p

yup yup.
woke up at 11, slept aft i had my lunch.
till 6!
unbelievable.
den made arrangements to meet a couple of frens.
hahaha it act. took my mind off some stuff.
tt's why i can joke and luff now ba....
hahaha
half de time i was whining to niang niang thou.
sorry niang niang..
tot i was rather irritating.

argh

moving into another phase of my life tml...
working a part time job for qt a long time..
at least 3 mths.
sorta putting half a foot into the working society...
hrmm wonder wat kind of life tt'll be.
sucky?
exciting?
boring?
it'll def be tiring i think...
but think tt's wat i nid now.
stuff to keep me occupied. so i wont be thinking too much
hahahahah

yi ge ren bu suan kun rao
ai shui ran hen mei miao
que bu neng wei le ji mo
gen xian ru ni zhao

ai yao nai xing deng dai
zi xi xun zao
gan jue hen zhong yao
ning ke kong bai le shou
deng dai yi ci zhen xing de yong bao
wo xiang xing zai zhe ge shi jie shang
yi ding hui yu dao
dui de ren chu xian
zai yan jiao

liu guo de lei rang wo xue xi dao
ru he qu fen....
ai bu shi ying zhong xu yao..
..

lalalalla

betta day tml.

*looks ard*

hahaha
i'm wasting my life away as usual.

sleep till 1150 today and met my sister to go ktv.
I ENJOY SINGING!
thou i shouldn't be singing now.
hahaha
i'm actually arranging another session tml
but my frens yet to reply me.
guess i'll hafta do some calling later.

den again.
i was thinking, maybe i shld leave de last day of de year to myself.
u noe, sitting in my studies alone.
think of wat i haf done in de past year.
wat's good and wat's bad
so i can do betta nez year.
dun sound like me yeah?
but i think i shld do it once in a while.
=p

brb.
go take my contacts out....

yupzz
here i am~

and i gotta call tuition agency tml!
hahaha
i'm thinking of saving some money to buy secondary sch text bk
if i'm teaching sec sch maths..
but aft some calculations.. de amt is rather large.
sighz.

yeah..
decided tt i shld onli decide my dir in life when my results are out...
and i'm already freaking out about my results.
argh.
i really wonder what will happen if i flop tis.
i dun think i'll haf de courage to face it, and to start all over again.

anyhow>> beginning to wonder why some pple like clubbing so much.
personally, i enjoy goin with my frenz. dancin with em. drink with em
with de pple i noe.

i realised i'm getting afraid.
afraid of getting close with pple, guys esp.
not jus physically close, emotionally as well.
k, maybe not afraid.
jus denying any possibility tt anyone will "kan shang wo"
=)
hahaha i think tt's qt good thou.

i wanna earn money!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahahhaa
i wanna get my license by may.
go overseas in dec.
=)
my short term plan for de year.
*grinz*

we're frens again.
i'm glad.
at least i wont hafta feel bad.
think things are betta this way ba...

act. sometimes i'll still feel lonely.
=p
no one there specially for me.
no one to listen and talk to me everyday.
no one dat i can sha jiao to.
no one i can make lil things for.
no one to take care of me.
hahaha
this is wat pple call freedom.
freedom = doin all de things u wan anytime, anywhere.
emptiness = too much time, dunnoe wat to do.

i think i feel empty.
i cant think of things i wanna do.
seriously.
except goin out with frens for coffee, ktv session, shopping, movie.
i nid something to commit to.
feels like a kite without string attached.
feels like a boat lost at sea.

de kite might look free without de string, but without de string, de kite can onli fly where de wind carries it. no dir of its own.
think it's true for me.
as a student.
as a person.

been studying most of de time.
now dat i've graduated from jc, i really dunnoe where i'm heading, wat am i suppose to do.
sad life ah?

so i aspire to travel!
hahaha
out of singapore.
to learn other things.
to widen my horizon...
to noe more pple

hahaha
i think i crap too much..
gtg
=)

happy new year...

hiak hiak hiakZzz
i'm in a rather good mood today.

went GH with my grandpa today for his appointments with de docz
rather positive
they say he has recovered
and de cancer cells are under control
so great news
thou we spent de whole morning sitting at de couch. waiting.
de air in hospital really bad.
i got a headache there..
blahzz

anyhow>>
came home and slept. or shld i say went into coma.
no idea why i was dead tired.

and i went cwp with my aunt and mom in de evening!
hahaha
and i got a pair of black pants out of it.

on top of tt>> i'm damn happy
hahaha

cant wait for tml~
i'm goin ktv!!!
but i'm still coughing non stop eh
wonder if i should stay home...
and wait for my dinner.
*deep tots*

or go walk walk with some1 else
RAH
decisions. =|

hrmm
i'm too busy to haf any chim tots nowadays.
feel like a bloody brainless ger nowadays eh..
living like a zombie

i shall spend some time to myself tml.
oh yeah>> and to find a tuition agency tml morning.

=)
gtg
byez

i'm still in a daze.
i din really took de medicine today thou.
guess my brain lacks oxygen.
cos both my nostrils are blocked.
I CANT BREATHE!...

argh

yeah!
i had a pleasant surprise today
due to my bad memory or my lousy hearing or eyesight
*grinz*
ignorance can sometimes be a bliss.
hiak hiak hiak...

haha k k tt was a really diff tone altogether.

anyhow>> i think i'll haf to sleep early today.
cos tml goin hospital with my cute ah gong.
to check up.
wonder wat time will de whole thing end...

act. i'm rather brain dead.
i cant write a blog now..
i'll come back to u when i get my brain organized.

cheers
=0
wr

no mood to write blog today
TMD