procrastinator...
i've got lotsa things waiting for me, i just cant bring myself to finish them..
1) Spring cleaning of the house
i've got to do this all by myself. My sisters are working, younger one isn't really very helpful. And my bf has decided not to help me out... sigh... my 4 room flat isn't very big, but still.. too big for me to spring clean...
2) YJ ALUMNI E-Newsletter
I've distributed the work out, but it is way too late to start writing in order to email it out in January.. Arghhh... I still have to put it together and send it out. Anyhow it is not within my control now. i'll just have to wait till fri and ask them for the write-ups.. den my stress will set in :(
3) Tuition
NEED another tuition assignment, but haven contacted any tuition agency yet. Matters are complicated because my aunt has a tuition assignment centre, and she has promised to help me with it. However things are taking a little too long because i'm so BROKE right now.. I'm living on the daily allowance my parents are giving me, which should be more than enough if i stay at home and not run around like i do. RAhhh. It is not helping when my current tuition kid is cancelling her lessons every week. *frustration*
4) Packed days
Isn't really something that i have to do, just something that adds on to my frustration. I'm goin to a chalet today (SNAVA - I HAVE TO PAY 20 DOLLARS!!!!) Thurs-hoping to leave it for paul, we'll see. Fri, i have dentist appointment and meeting dear KAIWEI for dinner i think. Really want to go out aft that, but we'll see whether i have enough money to go out :P. And... sat i've gotta go PKS to help out.
I wanna play game... do nothing at home i guess.. Yawns... read my book...
Suckz.
and school is reopening in 1.5weeks' time.
Oh and for all who wants to know how i did for exams: i did badly.
Results = devestation ever since i stepped into law school. Hardwork doesn't help. Not to mention hardwork + occassion game playing.
Byebye china exchange program. It is a little late to say i'm not suited for law so i guess i'll just say, i'm just not smart enough for law sch.. Suckz.
This is depressing.
this is life.
Monday, December 19, 2005
hahaha let me complete my unfinished business from yday...
as i was saying,
those in-charge weren't doing what they were suppose to do, doing things from other portfolio.. Bad management. I'm not saying everyone should stick to their job and not help others. However, when you want to help, you got to at least finish what you need to cover right?
Moreover, the vice chair and chair always stick together, like bee see honey lydat. Friend, if you donno the portfolio of vice chair right, let me tell you. It is to be there when the chair is not around. When chair is talking to campers, you will give instructions to the organisers. When chair need to attend to outside matters, the vice will take charge of the camp. Pls, don't stick to each other like girls go to toilet. You are running a whole camp of 160 over people, you need each other's company?
K i might be too harsh..the reason why i always get pissed off is because i expect too much from others and too lil of myself. Big big problem of mine. Gotta do something about it. New year resolution :d
I guess this time the good outweighs the bad at the camp because i'm kind of missing the camp. haha can't believe thou, but i don't miss it like the sabah trip thou. I believe it is because of the very nice people whom i met there. Yvette, Liwei (hahaha must write his name ah, cos he is reading), lok wei, rock, chu feng and randal. Logs and games team. Made the waterbombs, put up the castle wall, carry things, lame jokes, ghost stories, slack, eat.. everything together..
i guess of all people in the camp, i learnt the most from them. I guess others may think they're just a bunch of slackers, bunch of followers, indifferent to many things. But i see something else. I see them as a bunch of givers, very selfless people.
Talked to Liwei on msn yday, i still rem what he said "as long as i do what i am suppose to do, the campers are happy, i'm satisfied already"
I don't know how many of the organisers go with this mindset. And how many of them can actually do things behind the scene, not expecting any recognition, watsoever, and their satisfaction is from the camper's laughter and enjoyment.
When they forgot to thank the logs team, i was angry for them. But the logs team wasn't a least bit affected as i saw it. They joked about it to Lawrence, 'Oei... every year lydat one, forget to thank us... Don't do already lah' but they were laughing.
When everyone, GLs and organisers included, asked us for the light sticks, Chu feng insisted that the campers take first. When there wasn't enough and the stupid in charges collected the light sticks back. Yvette went to dig out another bunch from the boxes.
SBMY should be very thankful they don't have a selfish logs team. At the rate they are goin, a selfish logs team wont last long. True, everyone has their forte. They don't like to relate to people, therefore they want to be in logs. Not to say that GLs and other people are useless, but how many people can go on so long without appreciation? Perhaps i do not know the real story behind. I can only say they have earned my respect. A group of guys more matured than they and others think they are.
On the last night, we had our dinner as the campers were having debriefing. i was lying on the floor while ang hwee talked to the three of them. I pretended to sleep because i din want to talk. (partly because i just want to lie down) He commented on each of their character and their desire to learn buddhism. He told them that their desire and determination was weak. As i thought about it today, i wonder if it is because the group has became too big. That those who have certain understanding of buddhism has no time to reach out to them? to sit down and listen to them one to one? Is it time to devise a system, that those who are ready to receive more serious buddhism education to have classes, instead of a one-for-all class?
I just hope that at the end of all the fun, they still remember why they are doing what they set out to do.
as i was saying,
those in-charge weren't doing what they were suppose to do, doing things from other portfolio.. Bad management. I'm not saying everyone should stick to their job and not help others. However, when you want to help, you got to at least finish what you need to cover right?
Moreover, the vice chair and chair always stick together, like bee see honey lydat. Friend, if you donno the portfolio of vice chair right, let me tell you. It is to be there when the chair is not around. When chair is talking to campers, you will give instructions to the organisers. When chair need to attend to outside matters, the vice will take charge of the camp. Pls, don't stick to each other like girls go to toilet. You are running a whole camp of 160 over people, you need each other's company?
K i might be too harsh..the reason why i always get pissed off is because i expect too much from others and too lil of myself. Big big problem of mine. Gotta do something about it. New year resolution :d
I guess this time the good outweighs the bad at the camp because i'm kind of missing the camp. haha can't believe thou, but i don't miss it like the sabah trip thou. I believe it is because of the very nice people whom i met there. Yvette, Liwei (hahaha must write his name ah, cos he is reading), lok wei, rock, chu feng and randal. Logs and games team. Made the waterbombs, put up the castle wall, carry things, lame jokes, ghost stories, slack, eat.. everything together..
i guess of all people in the camp, i learnt the most from them. I guess others may think they're just a bunch of slackers, bunch of followers, indifferent to many things. But i see something else. I see them as a bunch of givers, very selfless people.
Talked to Liwei on msn yday, i still rem what he said "as long as i do what i am suppose to do, the campers are happy, i'm satisfied already"
I don't know how many of the organisers go with this mindset. And how many of them can actually do things behind the scene, not expecting any recognition, watsoever, and their satisfaction is from the camper's laughter and enjoyment.
When they forgot to thank the logs team, i was angry for them. But the logs team wasn't a least bit affected as i saw it. They joked about it to Lawrence, 'Oei... every year lydat one, forget to thank us... Don't do already lah' but they were laughing.
When everyone, GLs and organisers included, asked us for the light sticks, Chu feng insisted that the campers take first. When there wasn't enough and the stupid in charges collected the light sticks back. Yvette went to dig out another bunch from the boxes.
SBMY should be very thankful they don't have a selfish logs team. At the rate they are goin, a selfish logs team wont last long. True, everyone has their forte. They don't like to relate to people, therefore they want to be in logs. Not to say that GLs and other people are useless, but how many people can go on so long without appreciation? Perhaps i do not know the real story behind. I can only say they have earned my respect. A group of guys more matured than they and others think they are.
On the last night, we had our dinner as the campers were having debriefing. i was lying on the floor while ang hwee talked to the three of them. I pretended to sleep because i din want to talk. (partly because i just want to lie down) He commented on each of their character and their desire to learn buddhism. He told them that their desire and determination was weak. As i thought about it today, i wonder if it is because the group has became too big. That those who have certain understanding of buddhism has no time to reach out to them? to sit down and listen to them one to one? Is it time to devise a system, that those who are ready to receive more serious buddhism education to have classes, instead of a one-for-all class?
I just hope that at the end of all the fun, they still remember why they are doing what they set out to do.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Mr Paul is BACK!!!! YEayyyy
Haven been writing anything in the blog, decided to type something before he gets home and call me :D
Just went to help out at a buddhist camp, thankz to alvino and xiong, if not i wouldn't have been there. Probably spent my 3 days doing nothing at home, playing maple story and missing my boyfriend.
but everytime i go for SBMY camp (my second time) i seem to come back with a lot of complaints. Well, i'll elaborate on the good things that happened to me after my angry rant..
actually this time the overall camp was pretty nicely put together. probably because i wasn't a camper but one of the organisers (more like sai kang warrior). They invited speakers who actually look pretty pro, and the usual, meditation games yada yada. The movies were very nice also.
However, i wasn't too happy with the camp mistress, or rather her style of management. On day 0, we were asked to go help bring things from SBMY temple to camp site at LCK. She came in, asked us to gather for briefing. Things started out alright, i tot she looked pretty nice to work for. However, seems like she wanted to compensate for her size, her speech carried a pretty threatening tone. She said things like "Anyone with no forms have to go home tomorrow." and "Every bit of rice you are taking now is bought with the money from the donation box at the temple. Everyone of you should know how difficult it is for us to collect money there. So i hope all of you will not take time off during the camp".. well to both tt statment, i was thinking to myself, "since i dun haf forms i might as well go home now." and "den why am i paying camp fees for?" respectively...
Well, she totally pissed me off.
Anyway, i wasn't there for the first day. so no comments.
Second day onwards started the crazy schedule, (plus i had very bad cramps on dat day) had to walk like... 20 mins under the scorching sun, to the frog farm once i got to campsite. then conduct games till throat was super sore. den stupid timing, all come together.. do till i headache. but i really enjoyed my station.. cos i got to tekan pple. HAw Haw Hawwww
after which just kept making water bombs, cos they needed them to play some sniper games... Which i didn't join cos by then my cramps were killing me.. I just showered and went to bed.
Third day also sianed... morning wake up go sun tan liao... do up the 'castle wall' under the sun. meanwhile feed the ants (cos we were in the field).. afterwhich make water bombs again for war game (7,500 water bombs made altogether) afternoon i go sleep again hahahhaa at night there was campfire..
then i blood boil again.
Before the campfire, there was buffet dinner for us, parents who came for the campfire. organisers had to take last so by the time they finished taking, there was nothing but garnish left for us...
Missy asked us to attend to the parents, entertain them. I look like wat? PR ah? not i dunwan to talk to them, they dunwan to talk to me k. First, they are there to look at their kids interact, film their kids. Second, they were eating, am i suppose to interrupt their meal? third, you have so many GLS who can talk to the parents about their kids, why ask the logs pple to go talk to the parents? tell them how to make waterbombs?
STUPID nia..
YOUR ORGANISERS are sitting down, doesn't mean they haven done anything yet. Allocated the job liao den trust them to do the job, trust ur heads to make them work. Dun say things like "eh, you guys like campers lydat, must call so many times den move". The only reason they're not movie is because ur head is not doing his job, ur head is not doing his job is because YOU are not doing ur job!
Camp mistress always in front of the campers givin instructions, games-IC doing MC job at the same time.
Oeiii i haven finish..
TO BE CONT...
wr
Haven been writing anything in the blog, decided to type something before he gets home and call me :D
Just went to help out at a buddhist camp, thankz to alvino and xiong, if not i wouldn't have been there. Probably spent my 3 days doing nothing at home, playing maple story and missing my boyfriend.
but everytime i go for SBMY camp (my second time) i seem to come back with a lot of complaints. Well, i'll elaborate on the good things that happened to me after my angry rant..
actually this time the overall camp was pretty nicely put together. probably because i wasn't a camper but one of the organisers (more like sai kang warrior). They invited speakers who actually look pretty pro, and the usual, meditation games yada yada. The movies were very nice also.
However, i wasn't too happy with the camp mistress, or rather her style of management. On day 0, we were asked to go help bring things from SBMY temple to camp site at LCK. She came in, asked us to gather for briefing. Things started out alright, i tot she looked pretty nice to work for. However, seems like she wanted to compensate for her size, her speech carried a pretty threatening tone. She said things like "Anyone with no forms have to go home tomorrow." and "Every bit of rice you are taking now is bought with the money from the donation box at the temple. Everyone of you should know how difficult it is for us to collect money there. So i hope all of you will not take time off during the camp".. well to both tt statment, i was thinking to myself, "since i dun haf forms i might as well go home now." and "den why am i paying camp fees for?" respectively...
Well, she totally pissed me off.
Anyway, i wasn't there for the first day. so no comments.
Second day onwards started the crazy schedule, (plus i had very bad cramps on dat day) had to walk like... 20 mins under the scorching sun, to the frog farm once i got to campsite. then conduct games till throat was super sore. den stupid timing, all come together.. do till i headache. but i really enjoyed my station.. cos i got to tekan pple. HAw Haw Hawwww
after which just kept making water bombs, cos they needed them to play some sniper games... Which i didn't join cos by then my cramps were killing me.. I just showered and went to bed.
Third day also sianed... morning wake up go sun tan liao... do up the 'castle wall' under the sun. meanwhile feed the ants (cos we were in the field).. afterwhich make water bombs again for war game (7,500 water bombs made altogether) afternoon i go sleep again hahahhaa at night there was campfire..
then i blood boil again.
Before the campfire, there was buffet dinner for us, parents who came for the campfire. organisers had to take last so by the time they finished taking, there was nothing but garnish left for us...
Missy asked us to attend to the parents, entertain them. I look like wat? PR ah? not i dunwan to talk to them, they dunwan to talk to me k. First, they are there to look at their kids interact, film their kids. Second, they were eating, am i suppose to interrupt their meal? third, you have so many GLS who can talk to the parents about their kids, why ask the logs pple to go talk to the parents? tell them how to make waterbombs?
STUPID nia..
YOUR ORGANISERS are sitting down, doesn't mean they haven done anything yet. Allocated the job liao den trust them to do the job, trust ur heads to make them work. Dun say things like "eh, you guys like campers lydat, must call so many times den move". The only reason they're not movie is because ur head is not doing his job, ur head is not doing his job is because YOU are not doing ur job!
Camp mistress always in front of the campers givin instructions, games-IC doing MC job at the same time.
Oeiii i haven finish..
TO BE CONT...
wr
Thursday, December 08, 2005
| Your 2005 Song Is |
 Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day "My shadow's the only one that walks beside me My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating" In 2005, you bummed everyone out. Like you care. |
| Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating |
 You're not ready to go walking down the aisle. But you may be ready in a couple of years. You prefer to date one on one, with a commitment. And while chemistry is important, so is compatibility. |
| How You Are In Love |
 You fall in love quickly and easily. And very often. You tend to give more than take in relationships. You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard. |
| You Are Mexican Food |
 Spicy yet dependable. You pull punches, but people still love you. |
| Your Outrageous Name is: |
 |
| You Are 40% Weird |
 Normal enough to know that you're weird... But too damn weird to do anything about it! |
| Your Sexy Brazilian Name is: |
 |
| Your Summer Ride is a Beetle Convertible |
 Fun, funky, and a little bit euro. You love your summers to be full of style and sun! |
| Your Hair Should Be Pink |
 Hyper, insane, and a boatload of fun. You're a traveling party that everyone loves to follow. |
| Your Eyes Should Be Brown |
 Your eyes reflect: Depth and wisdom What's hidden behind your eyes: A tender heart |
| Your Animal Personality |
 Your Power Animal: Eagle Animal You Were in a Past Life: Whale You are active, a challenger, and optimistic. Hard-working, you are always working towards a set goal. |
HAhahhaha Saw the birthdate thingy at my friend's blog, decided to try it out(I guess largely because i am waiting for a patch for my game (Romance of the Three Kingdom). Yes i've upgraded (not much thou) to a thinking game.
But the reason why i'm patching it is because i cannot use the cheat codes!!! HAHAHAH i've no shame in saying that. Because i only have like 8 people to protect two carriages! RAHHh How do they expect me to strategise that?!
Obviously i cannot be a war strategist. (how ever that occupation is called)
Muahahah back to try my cheat codes.
(now you guys know i'm busy with...surprise, surprise!)
LOL
WR
But the reason why i'm patching it is because i cannot use the cheat codes!!! HAHAHAH i've no shame in saying that. Because i only have like 8 people to protect two carriages! RAHHh How do they expect me to strategise that?!
Obviously i cannot be a war strategist. (how ever that occupation is called)
Muahahah back to try my cheat codes.
(now you guys know i'm busy with...surprise, surprise!)
LOL
WR
| Your Birthdate: May 29 |
 You have the mind of an artist, even if you haven't developed the talent yet. Expressive and aware, you enjoy finding new ways to share your feelings. You often feel like you don't fit in - especially in traditional environments. You have big dreams. The problem is putting those dreams into action. Your strength: Your vivid imagination Your weakness: Fear of failure Your power color: Coral Your power symbol: Oval Your power month: November |
Friday, December 02, 2005
Actually i got a number of things to blog about, since i haven been blogging for some time. LOL Dun blame me, blame my exams.
Had the Alumni Tea on 26th Nov. I thought it went pretty well for first timers, for starters. Other than the VP telling the members how much money the sch plans to make frm the 20th Anniversary events, i would say things went like we planned.
Actually i couldn't believe it when VP was talking about the amount of donations they hope to get from the Alumni. Not to mention that she was the first to present. Using the same blunt way and telling us that the college only wants money from us like last year, i really wonder why am i doing this.
Tried as i might during my presentation, our presentation, i guess we had lost some of them. On top of that, many did not come wanting to help i guess. Most came for the friends, the teachers.
It is going to be a long and difficult journey...
I guess what YJ students lack is confidence to speak up, like most of the Singaporeans. Or they just cant be bothered. I'd rather the former, at least that is something i can help. People who are indifferent, will remain so. In some aspects of my life, perhaps i should be the last person to criticise about these people. Still, i have to say it. Guess some people lose grip in their life, others neva find it. I really wonder what are they living for? Without dreams, without anything that they are willing to work hard for, without something that they really want, without a belief in life.
I don't know, how do you teach awareness? How do you teach someone to learn how to observe? observe others, observe themselves. Knowing who they are, their principles in life, what do they want.
Met up with a friend from JC yesterday. He changed a lot. No longer the loud mouth that he used to be. I believe he is someone who knows what he want, and he is going out for it. He is trying to better himself. From his mannerism and what he speaks of, i can sense that he went through alot. Became more matured than most of our classmates have. Being one of the students that he has praised, i'm glad this friend of mine has proven him right. More than that, i'm happy for him.
I've heard other guys say 'i think i've matured alot from this. I wont look at life the same angle again.' Then later, he say that 'i would have joined, if there were any pretty girls in the club.' Then you wonder what may his definition of maturity be...
Sian.
-wr-
Had the Alumni Tea on 26th Nov. I thought it went pretty well for first timers, for starters. Other than the VP telling the members how much money the sch plans to make frm the 20th Anniversary events, i would say things went like we planned.
Actually i couldn't believe it when VP was talking about the amount of donations they hope to get from the Alumni. Not to mention that she was the first to present. Using the same blunt way and telling us that the college only wants money from us like last year, i really wonder why am i doing this.
Tried as i might during my presentation, our presentation, i guess we had lost some of them. On top of that, many did not come wanting to help i guess. Most came for the friends, the teachers.
It is going to be a long and difficult journey...
I guess what YJ students lack is confidence to speak up, like most of the Singaporeans. Or they just cant be bothered. I'd rather the former, at least that is something i can help. People who are indifferent, will remain so. In some aspects of my life, perhaps i should be the last person to criticise about these people. Still, i have to say it. Guess some people lose grip in their life, others neva find it. I really wonder what are they living for? Without dreams, without anything that they are willing to work hard for, without something that they really want, without a belief in life.
I don't know, how do you teach awareness? How do you teach someone to learn how to observe? observe others, observe themselves. Knowing who they are, their principles in life, what do they want.
Met up with a friend from JC yesterday. He changed a lot. No longer the loud mouth that he used to be. I believe he is someone who knows what he want, and he is going out for it. He is trying to better himself. From his mannerism and what he speaks of, i can sense that he went through alot. Became more matured than most of our classmates have. Being one of the students that he has praised, i'm glad this friend of mine has proven him right. More than that, i'm happy for him.
I've heard other guys say 'i think i've matured alot from this. I wont look at life the same angle again.' Then later, he say that 'i would have joined, if there were any pretty girls in the club.' Then you wonder what may his definition of maturity be...
Sian.
-wr-
Monday, November 14, 2005
Woke up bright and early today to study (Sunday eh!), but 3 pages into my CLT text, half my mind is thinking about maple story... So i thought i'll blog instead of starting the game, in case i cannot end it later ;p
Well there isn't much to blog about, have been studying the whole week. Din quarrel with paul, usually no one at home, din even read the papers... Think my life is pretty dead right now. Cannot stop thinking about what i want to do when my papers are over...
I just read about Andy lau yesterday on a two week old magazine. Talks about how he work 365 days a year, given his status and wealth, he can easily take things slowly, become more arrogant, etc. Instead of having more and more silly news like who might he be dating, changing gf every week, he has always appeared 'clean' and well taken care of by the reporters. The report mentioned his 25 years of hard work on the silver screen. What struck me is this paragraph.
When we were in school, we always admire the student who manages to do well without studying but simply smarter than the rest. However, we always neglect the ones who really work for their good results. This is human nature, we like reap what we are lazy to sow. We want to get things without working for it.
This is a perfect description of me.
Everyone wishes to think that he is the smart one, who only have to do a little last minute revision before the exam and can pass with flying colours. I'm one such example, ever since secondary school. I remember the days i spent sleeping in classes, failing all my tests, going to fast food restaurants after school. Come sec 4, mugging near the prelims to pass my maths and sciences. Picking and choosing chapters to study for humanities.
Fortunately, i scrapped through my prelims, ended up in YJ.
Come O'lvls, my results were far worse than what my friends. I couldn't complain.
It was difficult to convince myself that i have to work hard for what i want, because i'm no one special. In fact, all these years of education have taught me that, i'm especially unlucky. If i failed to revise, work hard, then it is more likely than not i wont do well.
It is painful to realise.
Such experience is impossible to teach. As much as you tell someone else this, it will not be effective as going through it yourself.
I told my sister two days ago after joggin,
"I can only support u as much as i can when you are putting in the effort. If you have given up, there isn't must i can do. And remember, no one will wait for you to help u."
I bet she cant rem it by now.
But i guess i was just trying to remind myself of something i've begun to forget.
Cheers!
Well there isn't much to blog about, have been studying the whole week. Din quarrel with paul, usually no one at home, din even read the papers... Think my life is pretty dead right now. Cannot stop thinking about what i want to do when my papers are over...
I just read about Andy lau yesterday on a two week old magazine. Talks about how he work 365 days a year, given his status and wealth, he can easily take things slowly, become more arrogant, etc. Instead of having more and more silly news like who might he be dating, changing gf every week, he has always appeared 'clean' and well taken care of by the reporters. The report mentioned his 25 years of hard work on the silver screen. What struck me is this paragraph.
When we were in school, we always admire the student who manages to do well without studying but simply smarter than the rest. However, we always neglect the ones who really work for their good results. This is human nature, we like reap what we are lazy to sow. We want to get things without working for it.
This is a perfect description of me.
Everyone wishes to think that he is the smart one, who only have to do a little last minute revision before the exam and can pass with flying colours. I'm one such example, ever since secondary school. I remember the days i spent sleeping in classes, failing all my tests, going to fast food restaurants after school. Come sec 4, mugging near the prelims to pass my maths and sciences. Picking and choosing chapters to study for humanities.
Fortunately, i scrapped through my prelims, ended up in YJ.
Come O'lvls, my results were far worse than what my friends. I couldn't complain.
It was difficult to convince myself that i have to work hard for what i want, because i'm no one special. In fact, all these years of education have taught me that, i'm especially unlucky. If i failed to revise, work hard, then it is more likely than not i wont do well.
It is painful to realise.
Such experience is impossible to teach. As much as you tell someone else this, it will not be effective as going through it yourself.
I told my sister two days ago after joggin,
"I can only support u as much as i can when you are putting in the effort. If you have given up, there isn't must i can do. And remember, no one will wait for you to help u."
I bet she cant rem it by now.
But i guess i was just trying to remind myself of something i've begun to forget.
Cheers!
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Fell sick while trying to study. Couldn't sleep then, sickness aggravated. Mum forced me to see the doctor last night. Paul came to pick me up to see the doc...
Very tired now, don't feel like studying after studying from 8am to 12 noon just now. Took a nap till 230pm. But wasn't helpful. Now i feel more drained than anything.
He refused to come over because my parents are home.. Sigh, we've been through this before. I don't know his issues with seeing my parents. He wasn't like that when he wanted to patch. I don't know if i'm asking for too much, but i just want him ard when i'm not feeling well.
Things don't change, do they? maybe i'm whining over nothing. But since i'm down with flu, i have the license to do all these. Just blame it on the medication.
I went to ur event despite being sick, spent the time i shld be resting with you, your family and everything that was important to you. Unlike you, i could have spent that time studying. Perhaps you thought that was for my good. But on my part, all i thought of when i contemplated if i should go, was that it was important for you. Down with cold, sitting in the air-con room for 2 hours plus, i'm willing to go through. My house, with my parents, too much?
It is not because the difference in character.
You're right, i need all your attention.
I'm just too disappointed right now. If history has to repeat itself everytime pressure adds on, i'm sorry, i can't take it.
I have my enough pressure on me, i told you before, i don't need anymore.
Very tired now, don't feel like studying after studying from 8am to 12 noon just now. Took a nap till 230pm. But wasn't helpful. Now i feel more drained than anything.
He refused to come over because my parents are home.. Sigh, we've been through this before. I don't know his issues with seeing my parents. He wasn't like that when he wanted to patch. I don't know if i'm asking for too much, but i just want him ard when i'm not feeling well.
Things don't change, do they? maybe i'm whining over nothing. But since i'm down with flu, i have the license to do all these. Just blame it on the medication.
I went to ur event despite being sick, spent the time i shld be resting with you, your family and everything that was important to you. Unlike you, i could have spent that time studying. Perhaps you thought that was for my good. But on my part, all i thought of when i contemplated if i should go, was that it was important for you. Down with cold, sitting in the air-con room for 2 hours plus, i'm willing to go through. My house, with my parents, too much?
It is not because the difference in character.
You're right, i need all your attention.
I'm just too disappointed right now. If history has to repeat itself everytime pressure adds on, i'm sorry, i can't take it.
I have my enough pressure on me, i told you before, i don't need anymore.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
shld try very hard not to get distracted by anything today...
better start the day by chanting...
mayb will ask uncle to send me that chant again..
ahahhaha
It helps me to focus
:D
WWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGGG
oH,
btw it is my younger sister's birthday todaY!!!
she is a halloween baby then, hahaha i think that explains why she is so queer...
Wonder if i shld celebrate for her
ahahahah
better start the day by chanting...
mayb will ask uncle to send me that chant again..
ahahhaha
It helps me to focus
:D
WWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNGGGGGGG
oH,
btw it is my younger sister's birthday todaY!!!
she is a halloween baby then, hahaha i think that explains why she is so queer...
Wonder if i shld celebrate for her
ahahahah
Sunday, October 30, 2005
I ended because my breakfast was here...
I just wanna mention something else
I think many of the human rights supporters will be jumping when they see this post (not for joy definitely)
Anyway, from my previous entry, it is easy to infer that I think human rights can be consented away. Meaning, if they people choose to do something wrong, they have no human rights. That is not what i am proposing.
My idea of Human rights is based upon people making choices (as wrong as i may be), and i will go as far as saying the state policies should not be subjected to Human rights (which is very wrong for many of you out there.) Let my try to explain myself first:
My idea of Human rights is based upon the choices people make, you have the right to make choices in what you want to do, how to do it, legally or illegally. The consequences that comes with it is because of the choices they make. They will be punished or awarded based on those choices, the right of choice. The consequences are sought of foreseeable and ought not be subsumed under 'right', if need be, perhaps 'right to be punished', because each one is rational individual (an assumption...)
The state ought not to be subjected to my idea of human rights because the choice is by individuals. The consequences sanction by the state is decided after weighing the rights of different categories of people. Some balance ought to be struck definitely, but more often than not, other factors such as the market interest, relationships with other countries etc will come into play. The state has also to be stern about their principles on certain things.
Anyway, at the end of the day, a lot of laws are not those that we break on a habitual basis. If we eat, work, shit, sleep as normal human beings. Will we go around killing people? Will we traffic drugs? Will we do weird things like pointing third finger at ur neighbour?
I just wanna mention something else
I think many of the human rights supporters will be jumping when they see this post (not for joy definitely)
Anyway, from my previous entry, it is easy to infer that I think human rights can be consented away. Meaning, if they people choose to do something wrong, they have no human rights. That is not what i am proposing.
My idea of Human rights is based upon people making choices (as wrong as i may be), and i will go as far as saying the state policies should not be subjected to Human rights (which is very wrong for many of you out there.) Let my try to explain myself first:
My idea of Human rights is based upon the choices people make, you have the right to make choices in what you want to do, how to do it, legally or illegally. The consequences that comes with it is because of the choices they make. They will be punished or awarded based on those choices, the right of choice. The consequences are sought of foreseeable and ought not be subsumed under 'right', if need be, perhaps 'right to be punished', because each one is rational individual (an assumption...)
The state ought not to be subjected to my idea of human rights because the choice is by individuals. The consequences sanction by the state is decided after weighing the rights of different categories of people. Some balance ought to be struck definitely, but more often than not, other factors such as the market interest, relationships with other countries etc will come into play. The state has also to be stern about their principles on certain things.
Anyway, at the end of the day, a lot of laws are not those that we break on a habitual basis. If we eat, work, shit, sleep as normal human beings. Will we go around killing people? Will we traffic drugs? Will we do weird things like pointing third finger at ur neighbour?
Tot i'll write a short one before looking for facts in my mock trials, and since i managed to read the papers today. Hahahah i realised ST is easier to understand than the evening chinese papers. The colour pictures are just too distracting for me, half the time sensationalising the news, telling me everything but what really happened... Is this what chinese pple are concern about now? as the Morning chinese paper grow thinner and thinner, i wonder what is actually available for them.
Anyhow, in the very slim chinese morning papers, I read an article about Australians (pple in melbourne) opposing our death penalty. Local court had sentence a Australian-Vietnamese(Aus by Nationality and Viet by birth, i think) to death penalty because of drug trafficking. This sparked the whole debate (again) about us not respecting human rights, etc. Being pressured by his people and the opposition party over there, the PM actually requested Singapore to be lenient when sentencing. In contrary to his earlier statement that Aus will not interfere when Australians break the laws of other countries.
(NB: anything that i'm writing is based on that article that i read)
I have to agree with the author to a great extent that we should not back down on this.
We had our death penalty since 1975, why in the world should we change our law, just because a foreigner has broken it HERE, with knowledge that death penalty existed HERE?
Apart from unusual circumstances such as some gang has kidnapped his family and threatened him into doing this.
If he wanted to escape death penalty, traffic the drug somewhere where there isn't any death penalty. I bet trafficking drug to Singapore gives them a higher profit margin because of the tough penalties here. So if you had assumed the risked because of the extra profits, That is a risk he has assumed and it materialised. What do these people want? A fair drug market ah?
Secondly, the essence of death penalty is to deter, granted, there are still people trafficking drugs, hence it is not 100% successful at deterring. This might be due to reasons of higher profits and demand (mayb in some extreme cases, just for the fun...) For a reasonable person, an act that attacts a punishment as serious as death will make him think twice before doing it. So logically speaking, EVEN the death penalty cannot ensure 100% no trafficking of drugs, wouldn't lessening the penalty make it more attractive to traffic drugs here?
Thirdly, the author mentioned that these people are crying out loud for human rights. So you see us as suppressing the accused, what about when the accused sell those drugs and affect thousands of people, who's family are broken up because of all the repercussions that drug addiction brings? What about the rights of these people? Should they not be protected then? In weighing out the rights of innocent consumers (as they always assume) and those people bring the drugs in from less regulated areas. The choice has to be made by the state, and the choice is clear.
Of cos, it may be argued that human rights activists are not asking for no penalty at all, but death penalty is just not justified. Well, as i mentioned above, it is meant as a deterrance. And Singapore is famous for her death penalty for drug trafficking. There seemed to be no reason why a drug trafficker won't have knowledge of the sentence that is attached to the crime. So equiped with that knowledge, he thought he could have made it out with more money than the same batch of drugs can fetch. Unfortunately for him, he was caught. The risks he had undertook came true, he was sentenced to death. Sad, yes. But he had implied consented. (hahahah contracts...)
i'm not some cruel bitch who want to see people dead. In fact, the first time i sat in high court to listen to a murder trial, i felt bad thinking that the max sentence for that man is death penalty, regardless of what i said before trial.
However, i believe the penalty is justified for drugs trafficking than murder (except of cos a serial killer or that sort). Murder may be because of a split second of rage, but not all rage cases can come under CHNAM (culpable homicide not amounting to murder). Drug traffickers are actually earning money by selling poison..
Once again, everyone entitled to their views. I'm just writing my stand...
Anyhow, in the very slim chinese morning papers, I read an article about Australians (pple in melbourne) opposing our death penalty. Local court had sentence a Australian-Vietnamese(Aus by Nationality and Viet by birth, i think) to death penalty because of drug trafficking. This sparked the whole debate (again) about us not respecting human rights, etc. Being pressured by his people and the opposition party over there, the PM actually requested Singapore to be lenient when sentencing. In contrary to his earlier statement that Aus will not interfere when Australians break the laws of other countries.
(NB: anything that i'm writing is based on that article that i read)
I have to agree with the author to a great extent that we should not back down on this.
We had our death penalty since 1975, why in the world should we change our law, just because a foreigner has broken it HERE, with knowledge that death penalty existed HERE?
Apart from unusual circumstances such as some gang has kidnapped his family and threatened him into doing this.
If he wanted to escape death penalty, traffic the drug somewhere where there isn't any death penalty. I bet trafficking drug to Singapore gives them a higher profit margin because of the tough penalties here. So if you had assumed the risked because of the extra profits, That is a risk he has assumed and it materialised. What do these people want? A fair drug market ah?
Secondly, the essence of death penalty is to deter, granted, there are still people trafficking drugs, hence it is not 100% successful at deterring. This might be due to reasons of higher profits and demand (mayb in some extreme cases, just for the fun...) For a reasonable person, an act that attacts a punishment as serious as death will make him think twice before doing it. So logically speaking, EVEN the death penalty cannot ensure 100% no trafficking of drugs, wouldn't lessening the penalty make it more attractive to traffic drugs here?
Thirdly, the author mentioned that these people are crying out loud for human rights. So you see us as suppressing the accused, what about when the accused sell those drugs and affect thousands of people, who's family are broken up because of all the repercussions that drug addiction brings? What about the rights of these people? Should they not be protected then? In weighing out the rights of innocent consumers (as they always assume) and those people bring the drugs in from less regulated areas. The choice has to be made by the state, and the choice is clear.
Of cos, it may be argued that human rights activists are not asking for no penalty at all, but death penalty is just not justified. Well, as i mentioned above, it is meant as a deterrance. And Singapore is famous for her death penalty for drug trafficking. There seemed to be no reason why a drug trafficker won't have knowledge of the sentence that is attached to the crime. So equiped with that knowledge, he thought he could have made it out with more money than the same batch of drugs can fetch. Unfortunately for him, he was caught. The risks he had undertook came true, he was sentenced to death. Sad, yes. But he had implied consented. (hahahah contracts...)
i'm not some cruel bitch who want to see people dead. In fact, the first time i sat in high court to listen to a murder trial, i felt bad thinking that the max sentence for that man is death penalty, regardless of what i said before trial.
However, i believe the penalty is justified for drugs trafficking than murder (except of cos a serial killer or that sort). Murder may be because of a split second of rage, but not all rage cases can come under CHNAM (culpable homicide not amounting to murder). Drug traffickers are actually earning money by selling poison..
Once again, everyone entitled to their views. I'm just writing my stand...
Friday, October 28, 2005
Just had a chat with my mom and sister, then i realised that i have been really lazy for the past year, compared to my days in YJ.
Sian... I think of the things i want to do in my life, and see that i have to work very hard to get them.. tt's when i start to give myself excuses to slack. E.g. too many smart people in law school, no way i can get a good grade.
Think of working hard just ... sounds tired... hhahahahaha yes, i'm plain lazy. My philosophy in life is "You gotta work hard to be lazy." Perfectly logical when you think about it..
Good bye Maple Story... Even if I don't get to go China for exchange, it is still for my own good to do relatively better this sem..
HAI...
It is when you try ur very best, and u get screwed up...
Perhaps tt's what i'm trying to pre-empt... as usual...
Sian.
Muah Ji in action..
Good bye to Muah Ji Me.
Wenrong
Sian... I think of the things i want to do in my life, and see that i have to work very hard to get them.. tt's when i start to give myself excuses to slack. E.g. too many smart people in law school, no way i can get a good grade.
Think of working hard just ... sounds tired... hhahahahaha yes, i'm plain lazy. My philosophy in life is "You gotta work hard to be lazy." Perfectly logical when you think about it..
Good bye Maple Story... Even if I don't get to go China for exchange, it is still for my own good to do relatively better this sem..
HAI...
It is when you try ur very best, and u get screwed up...
Perhaps tt's what i'm trying to pre-empt... as usual...
Sian.
Muah Ji in action..
Good bye to Muah Ji Me.
Wenrong
hey guys, sorry man, haven been updating my blog since god-knows-when...
Don't really have anything controversial, or interesting, or intellectual to put on my blog... But den again, i think nothing much here's any of the above, Hiakz
Anyhow, much of my life is taken up by Maple story, studying and Paul plus trying to get some social life. Blogging isn't really a priority right now..
Plus all the hype about bloggers being charged with the Sedition Act... Talking about the internet is a free space, to support free speech.
Look, like i've said one year ago, and i still stand by what i say now. You know very well you are writing on a public domain, you know there will be people looking whether or not u secure ur blog with a password. So if you face the consequences when you try to play with the rules.
Freedom of speech will only come if people start taking responsibilities of what they say.
Many people wont agree, my Law frens definitely. And i don't intend to argue with them. Everyone is entitled to their views. If they think that Singaporeans can afford to have more freedom in whatever they do when they cannot even take the responsibility to preserve the very fabric that Singapore is made up of, den so be it.
what xia.... suddenly i'm so popular on msn, everyone started msging me... 2 of them asking for muggers, one to ask me if i'm goin to the LFC retreat tml, one asking me about my fren whom he is interested in and... one asking if i'm free for gathering on sunday...
Law Sch's student exchange program just started taking in application. Initially i din wanna apply. First, my grades are really bad since year 1. I need my year 3 to pull them up in case i fall into the 2-2 category (which BCG won't wanna employ). Second, it will cost quite a bit, even if i'm goin to China. Sigh..
When i looked at the application form today and think about who to ask as referee, i realised i haven accomplished much in Law school. I wonder how many tutors really have a good impression or perhaps even an impression of me being in their class. I know i definitely have improved in some ways since Law Sch started. But i've also become more critical of myself, less confident in sch and i guess it is unhealthy?
I just received my prop law assignment grades yesterday - B-. I was told many people din do well. But then again, i've put in a lot of effort into this assignment, then. Then my fren who surf the net during tutorials got a better grade than me. Isn't it frustrating when however hard you work, you simply cannot get pass a certain grade?
I need to work harder.
Don't really have anything controversial, or interesting, or intellectual to put on my blog... But den again, i think nothing much here's any of the above, Hiakz
Anyhow, much of my life is taken up by Maple story, studying and Paul plus trying to get some social life. Blogging isn't really a priority right now..
Plus all the hype about bloggers being charged with the Sedition Act... Talking about the internet is a free space, to support free speech.
Look, like i've said one year ago, and i still stand by what i say now. You know very well you are writing on a public domain, you know there will be people looking whether or not u secure ur blog with a password. So if you face the consequences when you try to play with the rules.
Freedom of speech will only come if people start taking responsibilities of what they say.
Many people wont agree, my Law frens definitely. And i don't intend to argue with them. Everyone is entitled to their views. If they think that Singaporeans can afford to have more freedom in whatever they do when they cannot even take the responsibility to preserve the very fabric that Singapore is made up of, den so be it.
what xia.... suddenly i'm so popular on msn, everyone started msging me... 2 of them asking for muggers, one to ask me if i'm goin to the LFC retreat tml, one asking me about my fren whom he is interested in and... one asking if i'm free for gathering on sunday...
Law Sch's student exchange program just started taking in application. Initially i din wanna apply. First, my grades are really bad since year 1. I need my year 3 to pull them up in case i fall into the 2-2 category (which BCG won't wanna employ). Second, it will cost quite a bit, even if i'm goin to China. Sigh..
When i looked at the application form today and think about who to ask as referee, i realised i haven accomplished much in Law school. I wonder how many tutors really have a good impression or perhaps even an impression of me being in their class. I know i definitely have improved in some ways since Law Sch started. But i've also become more critical of myself, less confident in sch and i guess it is unhealthy?
I just received my prop law assignment grades yesterday - B-. I was told many people din do well. But then again, i've put in a lot of effort into this assignment, then. Then my fren who surf the net during tutorials got a better grade than me. Isn't it frustrating when however hard you work, you simply cannot get pass a certain grade?
I need to work harder.
Sunday, October 16, 2005
i'm addicted to maple story.
for those of you who have no idea what that is, it is an multiple-player RPG game which you play online.
For some reason i cannot d/l the new game client with the new additions to the game. It is disgusting how they take advantage of our addiction. They simply don't do a good job linking the downloads! And my stupid sch connection which usually can download things pretty quickly, chooses to screw up today. I'm left here, waiting for the game client to be done d/ling after 81 hours.
Damn i hate this.
Perhaps i shld consider quiting playing the game altogether. Considering my exams are round the corner
HAHAHA, yes my exams seem to be ancillary to the difficulties in d/lding, you haven't read me wrongly.
81 hours...
for those of you who have no idea what that is, it is an multiple-player RPG game which you play online.
For some reason i cannot d/l the new game client with the new additions to the game. It is disgusting how they take advantage of our addiction. They simply don't do a good job linking the downloads! And my stupid sch connection which usually can download things pretty quickly, chooses to screw up today. I'm left here, waiting for the game client to be done d/ling after 81 hours.
Damn i hate this.
Perhaps i shld consider quiting playing the game altogether. Considering my exams are round the corner
HAHAHA, yes my exams seem to be ancillary to the difficulties in d/lding, you haven't read me wrongly.
81 hours...
Thursday, October 06, 2005
I've just sent an email to the pro-tem team for YJ alumni, one with a pretty frustrated tone (according to my fren). However, i couldn't help it. On one hand i cannot expect everyone to put this as anywhere near a priority, on the other, i can't do this alone. I tot that since we have all pledged our commitment, we shld at least see it through. To establish a functioning ex-co and that's it. But here i am, having problem organising meetings with full attendance of the pro-tem, and getting response from them for event details or suggestions. As much as i try to make things easy for them by emailing them to inform and get feedback, their indifference makes it difficult for progress. How can i expect the greater mass of the members to respond, when the core group cannot get its act together? I really wonder if i should go on or to just f*ck it.
My own friends from YJ are not supportive of the alumni either. I've met up with a couple of friends for movie a few days back, the little time i was with them, i spent it trying to convince them to come back for the tea. I'm beginning to feel like i'm selling the alumni like MLM, trying to make them buy by harassing them. The closest friends i had, or so i thought, i had problem calling them to support me. Personally, i don't want them to think that i'm just looking for them when i have some agenda. I guess i'll have to attribute this to my absence from the group throughout my first year. No excuse. Most of them just took it as i've left the group because of my boyfriend and only looking for them when i break up. I can't blame them for feeling that way thou because it appears so. But i guess when i try to get them together, there isn't much to talk to them about except listen to their army stories. I don't blame them because their lives are just about army right now. However, it is difficult to organise a gathering when most of us are busy with our own lives.
I sometimes question my passion for the alumni.
I spent my most hardworking days in Yj, to be frank, the only thing i learnt is academic things (and largely not from the teachers). But i've learnt about life, really grew up in YJ. I've learnt that sometimes when life takes a nasty turn, it may be for the better. A place where i hated the system and learnt to live with it. A place where i got into trouble with the system but managed to survive it. A place where i've proved my worth to myself. I hate the school, used to.
That is why i want to change it.
Damn
My own friends from YJ are not supportive of the alumni either. I've met up with a couple of friends for movie a few days back, the little time i was with them, i spent it trying to convince them to come back for the tea. I'm beginning to feel like i'm selling the alumni like MLM, trying to make them buy by harassing them. The closest friends i had, or so i thought, i had problem calling them to support me. Personally, i don't want them to think that i'm just looking for them when i have some agenda. I guess i'll have to attribute this to my absence from the group throughout my first year. No excuse. Most of them just took it as i've left the group because of my boyfriend and only looking for them when i break up. I can't blame them for feeling that way thou because it appears so. But i guess when i try to get them together, there isn't much to talk to them about except listen to their army stories. I don't blame them because their lives are just about army right now. However, it is difficult to organise a gathering when most of us are busy with our own lives.
I sometimes question my passion for the alumni.
I spent my most hardworking days in Yj, to be frank, the only thing i learnt is academic things (and largely not from the teachers). But i've learnt about life, really grew up in YJ. I've learnt that sometimes when life takes a nasty turn, it may be for the better. A place where i hated the system and learnt to live with it. A place where i got into trouble with the system but managed to survive it. A place where i've proved my worth to myself. I hate the school, used to.
That is why i want to change it.
Damn
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