Me. Myself & i

lalalalal
went back to sch today to celebrate my didi's bday!!!
hahahah was quite an awkward surprise, din really work out the way it was suppose to be....

saw ma ma...
she was wearing the top i gave her!!!!
hahaha so happy!!! dunnoe jus feels good to see her..
althou we did not talk alot, or told each other alot, jus feels close to her.. something i dun really understand ba.. maybe i noe her much more than it seems..

anyway, mrs george was jealous!!! haha cos i bot mama a shirt but din get her anything.. oops... hahaha

din really haf much to do in sch.. except catching up with old fren, literally, cos it's de drink stall unker... dunno, make it a pt to find him everytime i go back. i think i'm closer to him than any other person in the sch.. jus feels like talking to my dad... when he tells me to take care of myself, dun get a bf so early and study hard and stuff lydat... somehow i feel easier to relate to him than to any of my teachers... LOL... perhaps deep down inside btwn me and my teachers, we'll always think that aft sometime, i'll stop visiting the sch and forget all about than.. in simpler terms, relations turn cold, and the students forget about their teachers and everyone moves on... how cynical. how cold. how adult...

wonder how i'll turn out to be when i'm one of them...

was with siok de whole morning. we talked alot... more than i've talked to all of them altogether since beginning of the year... never expect myself to lose track of time talking to anyone of them actually... talked about almost everything, frens family perspective of life... realise that i really dun wanna grow up... growin up means losing frens, becoming cold and cynical... and more burden to shoulder, more emotional burden... u get hurt but there's no one to go to.. becos u're an adult u shld be able to handle it... u let go of things more easily, see everything more lightly... the things u treasure are more realistic and tangible...

i'm afraid of growing up...

but it's inevitable.

u put up a brave front even when u feel sad... becos u're not suppose to let others see de weaker side of u.. u start to backstab, form alliance against each other... u start to do everything u can to earn more money, to sustain a so called comfortable life style...

u haf to be sensible.

u learn to let go of the love that u claim u'll protect for the rest of ur life.
u learn that there are other more impt things in life than the person u claim to love.
u learn that in life, many things are not within ur control.
u learn that in life, nothing's fair.
u learn that no matter how bad u feel, time heals all wounds.

hhahah ...

i saw an old fren of ours today
she asked about you
i din qt know what to say
heard u've been making more rounds round here
while i've been trying to make tears disappear...

chorus:
now i'm almost over you.
i'm almost shld feel good
so when u come back ard aft painting the town
u'd see i'm almost over you...

u're such a sly one with ur cold cold heart
maybe leaving came easy
but it torn me apart
time heals all wounds they say
and i shld know..
cos it seems like forever
but i'm letting you go....

(chorus)

i can forgive you and soon i'll forget all my shattered dreams
altho u left me with nothing to show
all our misery...

(chorus)

when u come back ard aft painting the town
u'd see i'm almost over you...