Me. Myself & i

man.
i feel that i've jus wasted 18 years of my life.
compared to him
i think i've wasted EVERY single sec this 2 wks.
he has surpassed de "eligible bachelor guy" stage to a zhi ji
someone whom i wouldn't dare to date in fear of losing him as a fren
someone whom i doubt i'll date due to circumstances.
someone who can really get me thinking about life, about goals, looking into de inner self.

i'm learning how to practise what i preach.
i'm finding de true goal in my life.
looking for things that really matter in my life.

man, i jus cant get enough of talking bout such intangible stuff.
thankz~.

another significant day in my life.
reminds me de analogy about self motivating leaders as fire starters
and leaders as charcoal, not knowin their own potential.
i guess i'm a piece of charcoal that needs constant liting from fire starters.
hahaha
wat a lousi piece of charcoal.

yup> he might be leaving sg for good
tt's rather sad piece of news
but i've learn something

no one is obliged to be there for anyone.

=)

i think i need time to find myself.
do some soul searching
b4 2003 ends.
b4 stepping into a new year.

today's meeting has not disappoint me a bit at all.

and i realised as well today
that i've not been as good a fren i tot i was all along.
i wasn't sensitive enough
rather self centred.
always completing other's sentences for others
most of all, i think i haven't been practising what i preached.

i realised i cant really change how pple think.
as much as i hope they'll change for e betta < according to my stds
i realised they might not see me as a figure important enough to cause an impact on their perspective of life.
they haf diff influences in their lives, diff fam backgrd.

i'm working towards being a better fren.
i suppose i'll try.
i dun see it as accomodating them
i see it as learning
learning to communicate with them.

i onli see it now.

i'll see it thru.

wr